Pete, if this is out of line and needs to be nuked, my apologizes beforehand. I’m in the garage adjusting the chain on the door opener, cleaning my bike, just putzing around. My neighbor pulls up, jumps out of his Jeep, and regales me with his just recent encounter with the Minnesota State Police. I like the guy. He’s from NYC, me from Philly. Been living next door since January. Going through a divorce. Or separation. Or something. He has a white 2018 Jeep Sahara with 36 inch tires, overhead LED light bar, brush guard with LED lights, Chris Kyle skull logos on it, and big NEW YORK decals on either side of the hood. He is also Jewish. I bring this up ONLY because it’s relevant to the story. Also has his kids with him because he took them to Jimmy John’s to get some sandwiches. Lance: I just got pulled over by a bull dyke State Trooper by Target. His words. Me: what happened? L: I was behind some guy at the stop sign. I saw the cruiser across the street. The guy stopped, went through the intersection but the Trooper didn’t move. Me: and? L: So I went. I didn’t get 50 feet down the road and the lights come on. Me: then what? L: she said I rolled through the stop sign. I told her “I’m sorry but I believe you’re wrong” Narrator: Never argue with the cop. You lose every time. L: she said I did and she said she was watching me. I told her I wasn’t, and she was wrong. Me: Come on Lance, you’re from NYC. You know better than to argue. Yes sir, yes ma’am, I’m sorry, I must not have been paying attention to foot pressure on the brake, whatever. I would have left this next part out, but I cannot for the life of me figure out why he said this. L: She started giving me some attitude. I showed her my Star of David and asked her if she was Anti-Semitic Me: (cringing and looking for a hole to hide in) Dude, you CAN’T say that. That’s an invite to an all expense paid trip to the Scott County Jail. L: she sees the kids and says “hold on”. She comes back and says, “I’m giving you a warning for the stop sign. He proceeds to show me three tickets she gave him for equipment violations Tires sticking too far out of the fender wells Narrator: Almost every Jeep in Minnesota has oversized tires. Some even have the shaved fender flares which make the tires stick out more. Both sets of off-road lights are uncovered. Narrator: Apparently in Minnesota there is some type of archaic law that says extra lighting has to be covered unless you are off-road. Also it appears the law is never enforced, unless you mouth off to the cop. So instead of a 50 or 60 dollar ticket, he got three for 625. Motto. Never argue with the cop. You always lose. Even if you’re right, you still lose. Don’t be a Lance.